I always said I wanted to have a set point to be “done” having babies. I absolutely did not want to have teenagers and babies at the same time. I thought to myself (and said aloud) “Can you even imagine?”. I’m always learning though.
When Cora is in a mood and grumpy and giving us attitude, it is the baby who can make her smile. When Della is sad about some sort of injustice, it is the baby who can make her smile. When Ada is being a three-year-old, it is the baby who can distract her out of the three-year-oldness.
They are forced to help more, to be less selfish. They bring me a diaper. Or they sit with Luisa for awhile and let me heat up dinner. They share their toys more. They share their love more.
I’m not saying having a bunch of kids is easier than one or two. There are fights and arguing and a lot of living to learn about. But now I wonder if having a baby in the house would be the perfect thing for a teenager. I’ve heard (and remember) the “fog” that teenagers go through. I am thinking a baby would be a good distraction. I’m not saying we should have a baby to make the teenage years easier. The inevitable has to happen and that baby will grow to be his/her own teenager! But I am softening my heart to having all kinds of ages in one house and seeing the beauty in it.
I used to think I needed to know when we were done having babies. I thought we had to have it all planned out. Now I say to that old view “can you even imagine?”.